Growing up Asian and in an immigrant family, survival and success meant adaptation. I could fit in, even excel, in any environment you put me in. I was (and still am) a master at reading a room, and perceiving what other people might want or need. These were essential skills during a childhood where I struggled for acceptance, and they helped me navigate the elite institutions I studied and worked in as an adult.
What I lost along the way was my sense of what I actually desired, what my own voice sounded like, what it felt like to be grounded within myself. All my attention was directed outward.
It wasn’t until my 40s that I let go of what I thought I needed to be, and turned toward becoming myself. It was the scariest and also the most miraculous thing I’ve ever done. I was afraid I’d have nothing left to hold onto. Instead I found beauty, love, freedom, and belonging. (I’ve written about this journey here and here.)
We can be comfortable in our own skin. We can experience the power of speaking in our own voice. It won’t sound like anyone else’s, and this is precisely where its power will come from. We can feel the exhilaration of our own creativity. We can stand in our own authority. We can create belonging on our own terms. It starts with belonging to ourselves. We can live a life that is truly our own.
If you know it’s time to live into this, I want to work with you. You may not feel ready. That’s OK. We’re never perfectly ready. What matters is that you know it’s time, and that the alternative is no longer acceptable.
My role as a coach is to walk alongside you, to help you see what needs to be seen, to help you believe in what’s possible when you forget, to be a midwife for the parts of you that want to emerge, and to support you as your life, inward and outward, begins to change.
If this resonates with you, contact me to schedule a time to talk.
“[W]e all begin the process before we are ready, before we are strong enough, before we know enough; we begin a dialogue with thoughts and feelings that both tickle and thunder within us. We respond before we know how to speak the language, before we know all the answers, and before we know exactly to whom we are speaking.”
- Clarissa Pinkola Estes